You Might Be Fat If…
Jeff Foxworthy says it best with his “you might be a redneck” narratives that allow the southerner in all of us to acknowledge our idiosyncrasies. It made me consider anecdotal “fat signs” that may, somewhat brutally, expose characteristics of overweight people.
My list of 10 telltale signs that you might be fat may lack humor; however, it is a surefire way to pinpoint a potential problem.
You might be fat if:
1. Your clothes don’t fit. There is no better time to take the “fat test” than between seasons. If the buttons on the shorts you wore last year are popping off—you have gained weight, and might be fat.
2. You avoid mirrors. I would venture to say that if you shirk looking at your reflection, you might be fat. My advice—look again. The only thing worse than being fat, is denying it.
3. Your mother—or worse, your father mentions it. When those that love you are concerned about your weight—you might be fat. Imagine the courage it took for them to broach this delicate subject—be brave enough to acknowledge there may be a problem.
4. You can’t see your feet and you are not pregnant. This one applies to the men too. Women like the pregnant look on a man about as much as we like male breasts. If you have either one of these —fix it. See #2.
5. You have no energy. Any extra, unwanted pounds can bring a plethora of problems—lethargy being the most obvious. If you are tired or lack energy, most of the time, you might be fat.
6. Your doctor suggests you lose weight. This may top all on the list of fat indicators. Most doctors are keenly aware of the dangers of carrying added fat. Doctors know how healthy you are from cholesterol numbers to the numbers on the scale. Take heed to a doctor’s orders!
7. You don’t know what you eat. If you have no idea how many calories you consume or the nutritional composition of your daily intake, you might be fat. A food journal may be the only cure for this haphazard consumption of food.
8. You don’t fit in desk chair. If someone has had to make special seating accommodations for you—you might be fat—and did you really need to be told? This goes along with the—you are unable to close your legs when you sit, sign. And the ever popular, you can rest your arms on your stomach, sign.
9. You suffer from heart palpitations. If you are experiencing these rapid heart rate episodes, you might be fat. Although this condition can be caused by other factors, it is most common in overweight or obese individuals.
10. The only green foods you consume are related to a St. Patty’s Day celebration. If your favorite food can be bought at a fast food restaurant, you probably don’t eat enough fruits and vegetables. If you aren’t fat from it, you are most assuredly not the healthiest grape in the bunch.
If you resonate with three or more of these fat indicators—it is likely you have a problem. If you aren’t sure if any of these signs apply to you—you might be in denial; again, see #2 above. Like any personal issue, a resolution isn’t possible without acceptance.
For questions or concerns email: suzannemcginnis@me.com