Appointments…

So Cheryl made an eye appointment for the twins for Tuesday, and somehow I got elected to take them.

At first, I thought it was going to be a pretty simple assignment; you know, leave early…get to the appointment on time…sit there patiently while the doctor does his thing…get the glasses…and go.

Whheellll…that sounds real nice, but it don’t go dat way roun ‘heya!

First of all, Mackenzie decided that she just had to go with us. She had finished her school and, technically, was authorized to go. But! A little dose of Mackenzie, added to the mixture of the twins, can create a confection that somehow loses its sweetness!

She asked nicely, with the appropriate number of “I love you Daddy’s” to persuade me into a yes; and away we went. I was optimistic, yet skeptical, as to how all of this was going to turn out.

Now, before I go any further, let me remind you that Cheryl is the one who schedules all of these little swaraes into parental bliss.

I’m just the pawn who is required to live them out! I got to the doctor’s office, and went in with the girls. When I approached the reception counter, I began to check in the twins.

I was told, by you know who, that I would not have to fill out any paper work and that the doctor had all of the records; and I was happy about all of that, because I just hate filling out paper work at the doctor’s office…especially on the children.

One of the main reasons for my attitude toward this little practice is the fact that I have absolutely no idea when any of my children were born, or where for that matter.

I don’t know their height, their weight, social security numbers, and sometimes have trouble with their middle names…ok, that’s a misleading lie…I even have trouble with their first names.

Yeah, pretty much the whole paper work experience just reminds me of what a terrible parent I am, and offers up ample opportunity for the lady behind the counter to glare at me like I’m a total idiot!

Look…If my wife wanted me to store all of this information about the children in my ever shrinking brain; she shouldn’t have had so many of them.

So there I am at the counter, being handed all of the required paperwork (while saying some unmentionables about my dear sweet wife to myself), when the lady says to me…” Mr. Parr, you’re here for the three girls’ appointments?” The look on my face must have been awesome!

See…she didn’t ask me this because she saw three girls with me…no!…she asked me this because evidently, Cheryl had scheduled an eye exam for Mackenzie months ago, and forgotten about it; she just happened to schedule the twins appointment on the same day by matter of coincidence, and the doctor was expecting all three of them to be at the office on Monday afternoon; and the only reason that I had all three wasn’t because we are that good…no…but because Mackenzie bugged me so much about going with me!

As I sat down in my chair and pulled out my phone, you know, to call Cheryl for all of the required information, I began to develop a terrible feeling that this adventure was not going to go well. Oh man if I had only known!

…to be continued

Jason, Father of six