Grandmaws Know All

Grandmaws must be the smartest people in the world. Whenever someone starts quoting someone, it is always grandmaw. You would think their mother might have said something worth quoting, but it always seems to fall back on grandmaw. I guess grandmaw has seen it all.

The other day as I was checking out at the store, I handed the cashier an opened package of ballpoint pens that I had found in my shopping cart. Apparently, the person who left the torn package had only needed two of the three pens. I commented on people stealing and grazing in the store.

She said, standing up straight and looking me in the eye, “as my grandmaw always said “if you’ll lie, you’ll steal, and if you’ll steal, you’ll kill.” Her grandmaw sure knew her stuff. I shivered thinking about all the lies I had told in my life, glad to know she did not know about me stealing that candy when I was four.

My grandmother was a mamaw and she did dish out some advice along with delicious blackberry cobbler. “Waste not, want not” was one of her favorites, having survived since the 1890’s, she oughta know.
Years after her death, we were clearing out her house and in her cedar chest I found little rolls of thread. I had watched her take the hem out of clothing and wind it around old matchbook covers. “Waste not, want not” rang in my ears.

One of the best things I ever did was sit down with my aunt and write her life history as she remembered it. These days she remembers things, well…about that long. Even aunts can dole out the advice, mine used to say “if you have to make an important decision, take at least a hour to think about it.”