Church Visiting
Can there be anything more intimidating than visiting a church for the first time?
I think that the walk from the car door to the front door of a church is one of the scariest strolls that there can be, and for many reasons.
I remember when I was younger, and had the desire in my heart to re-connect with the church. I wanted to be a part of a group of believers that would invite me into their world and love me for who I was…and I wanted to grow closer to God.
However…I was totally nauseated at the thought of visiting churches. Let’s see… what can I compare this experience with.
Well, there is the principal’s office when you know you are in trouble; there is traffic court when you were 25 miles over the speed limit; there’s the dentist when you have a cavity, the doctor when your cholesterol is high; there’s the surgeon when the CAT scan looks bad, the neighbor’s house when the dog got out, the bank when you are late on a payment (and still don’t have the money), the exam room when you know you didn’t study, the board meeting when you know you were in the wrong…and then there is walking into a church for the first time!
Churches have a certain “isms” that can be hard to process for a newcomer.
There is the uniform, for instance, and one never knows what that ensemble may be until they have entered the building. I tell you, sometimes you sit there (after realizing that you have not dressed appropriately) feeling like you are on stage in front of a lot of people, and you’re totally naked!
Then there is the “first time visitor” thing churches do. This is a lot like the “which of these things doesn’t belong” game. They know you are new, mainly because they have never seen you before in the building, and it’s their job to make sure that everyone else knows it too; all the while hoping to make you feel right at home!
Churches have a certain language that we speak, and we use words that a lot of people do not understand.
Take for instance the following (and think about hearing these for the first time in a context that does not make sense to you): brothers and sisters, blessed, fellowship, praise, bless you, I’m blessed, you’re blessed, offering and tithe, worship, elder, usher, sacrament, pew, eulogy, holy, glory, presence, congregation, spirit, offertory, testimony, confession, conversion, biblical, ministry, communion, and so on.
One can go looking for the secret de-coder key in a hurry if these words begin to fly around a first time church attender!
Then there are the people who feel like churches have assigned seating, or purchased season ticket seats.
If you are a new attendee, and you have mistakenly sat in one of these seats…believe me, you will know it; mainly by the mean looks that will be coming your way from the choir, and the person who is singing, that normally sits right where you have parked yourself!
If you failed to bring your checkbook, or any cash, the offering time will also provide a healthy dose of discomfort as the usher stands there waiting for you to respond to the basket hovering uncomfortably in front of your face!
Not to mention the fact that you have no idea that you’re supposed to take the thing and pass it to the person next to you, who is glaring at you because you failed to put anything in, and because she is the wife of the choir guy who is supposed to be sitting where you are!
There are many others as well. There is the unfamiliar music, the strange behavior, not knowing that you were not supposed to clap at the end of the special song, or that you were supposed to and didn’t.
There is the confusion that settles in as you try to follow in your Bible, but didn’t realize that the words are not matching because there is more than one translation of the Bible, a fact that you were never told.
And my heart really goes out to the people who visit a church on communion Sunday, and the church is one that refuses to serve people who are not members of that particular congregation…talk about feeling like a total outcast!
Yes ladies and gentlemen, visiting a church can be tough, scary, confusing, uncomfortable, and even hurtful at times…but one thing remains true; the local church is the hope of the world! So please, if you are looking for a church family, don’t give up! Keep trying until you find the right fit for you; I promise you it’s out there!
Somewhere in Jasper County is the church where you will feel loved, accepted, and where you can connect with God.
Oh, and while I’m at it…fellow church people; let’s all please try and remember what it felt like when we were looking for a church ourselves.
We can be the ones that help the new people to feel like they don’t stick out so much; we can explain some words to them, sit with them during the service, and introduce them to our friends.
Let us all try and make the church visiting experience easier for the ones who walk into our churches for the first time.