Have a Merry Christmas

Time is flying by, only a few more days to get the gift list finished. Either write your list down or face the consequences of leaving a spouse or other gift giver undirected.

Could that be the very reason that the return desk line is the longest line in the store?

As an amusement let’s look over the shoulder of the return desk clerk and observe what is returned.

A wife returns the thoughtful and personal gift her husband bought her, a vacuum cleaner. She really wanted a pair of red sequin moccasin house shoes.

The husband, a rabid NASCAR racing fan, and had dreamed someone would get him a racing experience where he would be able to don fireproof suit and helmet and play tag with some other good old boys on the track. He received a book, a pair of red socks and a new golf shirt. BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH HUM BUG!

So, you’ve been good or bad during the year and Santa has been making his notes, now’s the time to either put up or shut up, tick, tick, tick. If you are willing to be happy with potluck, last minute gifts, then proceed down candy cane lane, but getting what you really want is going to be hit or miss.

Better still just go buy what you want or order it, wrap it all pretty and what a fuss you can perform on Christmas morn as you exclaim, “How did you know, it’s just what I wanted?” Over the years this has been my tried and true method, quite successful if I do say so myself.

Now you have been aptly warned, take action, no need to send me a thank you note for this advice, it’s pro bono to all the fine citizens of Jasper County. And may I mention, Have Yourself a Merry Christmas and save yourself from the very long return lines.